LEAPING LIZARDS! IT’S THE MAN IN THE MIDDLE

Liberals and conservatives so pride ourselves on our values and thoughts, yet recent research shows us to be little more than the sum total of our genetic make up and synaptical firing patterns. We can’t help our lucky stars it seems. Pres. Bush can’t help it that he acts without thinking while liberals are more likely, like Hamlets, to think without acting. Sadly, our polarizing genetic make ups decree us to be at each others throats in the larger pack of animals we roam in, even though we have nothing to be proud of, therefore, nothing to fight about.

Of course, conservative "thinkers" do exist, but they’re more likely to be fact amassers, like a George Will, while the liberal thinker’s more likely to understand the human condition by instinct and by blazing insight, like Shakespeare. It’s outside observers versus inside knowers. It’s psychological knowledge versus history buffers, to reverse the order.

Of course, as a liberal myself, I can’t help noting that liberals know and admit more about themselves and their human weaknesses than most conservatives are capable of knowing and admitting. Conservatives are all outward bluster and bluff, fact spouting and surface seeing while the liberal’s all inward reflecting and deep. Conservatives have their Hestons, no real actor, and we our Clifts. They their Arnold Ss, and we our blazing Penns.

By genes and by choice, a liberal could no more be conservative than could a horse nor one of them a liberal than a moose. I say, leave it to the middle to set us straight. See us for the fools we are and for what our foolishness adds to the choice. Stand in the middle, man in middle, and neither look before you leap nor leap before you look.


"I stand by all the misstatements I have made.: —George Bush

Hear this George Bush, Pat Robertson, Jerry Wellfallen, etcetera: "When we talk to god we're praying. When god talks to us, we're schizophrenic." —Moses (just kidding) —Lily Tomlin